In a move to boldly index what has not been indexed before Google will launch its first (SSS) Super Space Spider later this year. This unmaned spaceship has been Nicknamed Ziggy Zardust in a reference from David Bowie’s rock band, The Spiders from Mars.
A NASA spokesman said ‘we are delighted that Google has taken this decision. Space is unordered, all these planets and stars everywhere, its chaos I tell you.’ President Obama has promised it will lead to new jobs but business leaders are not so sure.
Space needs sorting!
The race to index space is on with the Chinese search engine Baidu assenbling its own Super Space Spider. Although its not understood if the Chinese population will be able to access ‘Space results’ as they are outside of China. Microsoft are expected to launch its Bing Super Space Spider fleet the following year but not many people are expected to use it.
The English are to put a team together led by a bloke with sideburns from Norfolk called Brian. He’s been working on a prototype made of toilet rolls for seven years and expects to get funding for the project any day now.
The future of crawling
The move to bring order to the chaos that is deep space has thrown up new possibilities for the crawler industry. Some ask is there anything that cannot be crawled. The Google Brain Crawler is in development and a beta version could be out early next year. A Google spokesman said ‘yeah that’s right your brain could be indexed and accessed online’.
Consumer rights groups have voiced concern about the potential risks of having small crappy adverts appearing in your brain. When asked for his opinion at a press conference David Cameroon said ‘beam me up Scotty’, then looked nervously around the room as no one laughed.